never cold in his life until recently (november, 2011)

though
I'm sure
is the most hateful clause
breaker

and so, you sting it out
undoubted
in the crushing freeze
and cancerous rush
of a cigarette
below freezing

sting the letters out
syllable by syllable
until your fingers turn blue
with ink and frostbite

you treat the silence
as seeds
sow spaces
with craving
and fill up the empty
with the hint of potential

perhaps it's a lie
the comfortable fiction
you gladly glaze
over
tell yourself
that old lie
again and again

all senses become acute
in the crispcrusted moments
of realization
as the slowdown
inches in
and takes it all away

this time
I'm leaving nothing behind